“I like your style.”

“I like yours.”

“Can I sit down with you for a minute? 

"Sure.”

“Are you a writer?”

“No, I’m an amateur physicist.”

“Got any good stories?”

“So I’m at my physics study group at my bodega, and I’m tripping on molly, and this guy walks in, and he looks exactly like Maude, from Harold and Maude, and it’s just one of those silver bullet moments where you realize you’re instantly in love. Like instantly. And I just jumped on him, and I didn’t stop talking till like 6 in the morning. Then we parted ways.

The next morning he sends me this video, it’s called Paperman. It won an Oscar for like, best short. And the plot of that is there’s this guy. And he runs into this girl on the subway, and she gets her lipstick on a piece of paper. Then he goes to work and they miss each other, when he gets there she’s in the building across from him and he makes hundreds of paper airplanes trying to get her attention. And it doesn’t work. But then all these paper airplanes, in this Disney cinematic way, whirl him up and take him to her. 

So my guy lives in this mansion on Alamo Square. So I spent like the whole week making these papers airplanes for him. Like thousands of them, like stealing paper reams from work and making paper airplanes. I ask my friends to help me, so me and thirty other people cover this mansion. Fucking cover it.

He comes home and says, "Nobody’s ever done this for me before. I’m totally in love with you." 

So I win his heart…or so I think, because that’s the end of it and he never texts me again. Then when I get drunk enough to text him to asks ‘What gives?’ he texts back saying, ‘I’m sorry but my heart belongs to someone else.’

But then, 5 days pass and texts me again saying he made a mistake and he wants to be with me. So I don’t know if that’s  a good story yet. I don’t think the arc is complete.

So you know, I put myself out there. And now I’m invited back in, but I’m too scared to go there again because it failed…but it kinda succeeded. I don’t know.”