This guy walked out of a bar and said, “That’s all folks.”

“You all done for the night?”

“Yeah, I’ve gotta get home. I came home hammered the other night and got in trouble with my wife. I was shootin Tequila and I was so drunk I couldn’t follow the plot in a Vincent Price movie. I know you may think I’m too old to get in trouble but I’m not. And she wasn’t even mad that I was drunk, she was mad because I told her I wasn’t. She asked me ‘Have you been drinking?’ and I said, ‘Only one.’ She knew though, I don’t know what I was doing.”